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Discovering that a partner has been unfaithful hits you like an earthquake. Long after the first jolt, emotional aftershocks can make it difficult to be there for your family, manage your daily life, and think clearly about your options. Whether you want to end the relationship or piece things back together, Getting Past the Affair guides you through the initial trauma so you can understand what happened and why before deciding how to move forward. Based on the only program that’s been tested--and proven--to relieve destructive emotions in the wake of infidelity, this compassionate book offers support and expert advice from a team of award-winning couple therapists. If you stay with your spouse, you’ll find realistic tips for rebuilding your marriage and restoring trust. But no matter which path you choose, you’ll discover effective ways to recover personally, avoid lasting scars, and pursue healthier relationships in the future.
I highly recommend this book for anyone trying to live through infidelity. I have read several books and this one had so much helpful information. It was written in a way that didn't attack the participating party or the injured party but gave good information for all parties involved. Unfortunately my spouse chose not to read the book with me but reading it really helped me to understand and validate what I was going through. If you are faced with the heartbreak of infidelty this is a must read book. If you don't read anything else, read this.
I am a marriage and family therapist who only works with couples. Many of these couples come with either a current or past affair as a problem. Until this book came out, I recommended Not Just Friends, by Shirley Glass. While that is an excellent book, this book is even better. The chapters are crystal clear and specific. Each person is assigned a task in the healing. General principles are stated as frameworks so that each person has a mindset to go by. I will be recommending this book to all couples who come with this problem.
Michael T. Clifford LMFT Everett WA Certified Gottman therapist, Certified Emotion Focused Therapist
This is a great book for both partners in the damaged marriage. It uses non-offensive terms to refer to each of the involved parties. It provides very good strategies and examples for coping with the initial stages after the affair is discovered, as well as for working on repairing the marital relationship. It is particularly helpful with suggesting ways for each individual as well as the couple to reflect on why the affair occurred, to deal with emotional reactions, and to communicate with each other going forward. I have read several books, and this is one of the top two or three.
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