This is not the document you are looking for? Use the search form below to find more!
Adaptation Script
0.00 (0 votes)
Document Description
Adaptation Script
File Details- Added: July, 08th 2012
- Reads: 59
- Downloads: 5
- File size: 344.17kb
- Pages: 130
- content preview
- Name: Anna
Embed Code:
Content Preview
ADAPTATION
by
Charlie Kaufman and Donald Kaufman
adapted from the book
THE ORCHID THIEF
by
Susan Orlean
Revised - November 21, 2000
1
EXT. PLANET - DAY
1
SUBTITLE: THE EARTH
From space the Earth is brown and meteor-scarred. We move in
*
until we are on its endlessly barren and lifeless surface.
The atmosphere is hazy, toxic-looking. Volcanoes erupt.
Meteors bombard. Lightning strikes, concussing murky pools
of water. All this in silence.
2
INT. LARGE EMPTY LIVING ROOM - MORNING
2
SUBTITLE: HOLLYWOOD, CA, FOUR BILLION AND FORTY YEARS LATER
Beamed ceiling, ostentatious fireplace. A few birthday cards
*
on the mantel, two of them identical: "To Our Dear Son on His
Fortieth Birthday." Charlie Kaufman, a fat, balding man in a
purple sweater with tags still attached, paces. His
incantational voice-over carpets this and every scene he's
*
in. It is at times barely audible, but always present.
*
KAUFMAN (V.O.)
I'm old. I'm fat. I'm bald.
*
(reaches for notebook, catches
sight of bare feet)
My toenails have turned strange. I am
*
old. I am --
*
(flips through notebook, paces)
I have nothing. She'll think I'm an
*
idiot. Why couldn't I stay on that diet?
*
She'll pretend not to be disappointed,
but I'll see that look, that look --
*
(passes mirror, glances quickly
at reflection, looks away)
God, I'm repulsive.
(another glance)
*
But as repulsive as I think? My Body
*
Dysmorphic Disorder confuses everything.
I mean, I know people call me Fatty
*
behind my back. Or Fatso. Or,
facetiously, Slim. But I also realize
*
this is my own perverted form of self-
aggrandizement, that no one talks about
me at all. What possible interest is an
old, bald, fat man to anyone?
*
3
EXT. STATE ROAD 29 - DAWN
3
A lonely two-lane highway cutting through swampland.
(CONTINUED)
pg. 2
3
CONTINUED:
3
BRITISH NARRATOR
As natural selection works solely by and
for the good of each being, all corporeal
and mental endowments will tend to
progress towards perfection.
Suddenly, a beat-up white van barrels around a curve. It's
followed closely by an old green Ford.
SUBTITLE: STATE ROAD 29, FLORIDA, FIVE YEARS EARLIER
4
INT. WHITE VAN - CONTINUOUS
4
John Laroche, a skinny man with no front teeth, drives. The
*
van is piled with bags of potting soil, gardening junk. A
Writings of Charles Darwin audio cassette case is on the seat
next to Laroche.
BRITISH NARRATOR
It is interesting to contemplate an
entangled bank, clothed with many plants
of many kinds, with birds singing...
Laroche tries to contemplate the plants and birds whizzing
by. Almost too late, he spots the Fakahatchee Strand State
Preserve sign and makes a squealing right onto the dirt road
turn-off. The cassette case flies from the seat and half-
buries itself in an open bag of peat.
5
INT. GREEN FORD - CONTINUOUS
5
Nirvana blasts. Russell, Vinson, and Randy, three young
Indian men, pass a joint and watch the erratic van ahead.
RUSSELL
Laroche is asleep at the wheel.
RANDY
Crazy White Man is now Drowsy White Man.
They share a stoned laugh.
6
EXT. NEW YORK OFFICE BUILDING - NIGHT
6
SUBTITLE: NEW YORKER MAGAZINE, TWO YEARS LATER
Late night street. The click-click of typing. We move
slowly up the building to the only glowing window.
(CONTINUED)
pg. 3
6
CONTINUED:
6
ORLEAN (O.S.)
(wistful)
John Laroche is a tall guy, skinny as a
stick, pale-eyed, slouch-shouldered and
sharply handsome despite the fact that he
is missing all his front teeth.
*
7
INT. OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
7
We glide over a desk piled with orchid books, past a photo of
*
Laroche tacked to an overwhelmed bulletin board, and come to
rest on a woman typing. It's Susan Orlean: pale, delicate
and blond. We lose ourselves in her melancholy beauty.
ORLEAN (V.O.)
I went to Florida two years ago to write
*
a piece for the New Yorker. It was after
*
reading a small article about a white man
*
and three Seminole men arrested with rare
orchids they'd stolen out of a place
called...
*
8
INT. RANGER'S TRUCK - MID-MORNING
8
Tony, a ranger, drives past the Fakahatchee Strand State
*
Preserve sign and enters the swamp. He sees the white van
and Ford parked ahead, spots a Seminole license plate on the
Ford. He pulls over down the road, whispers into his C.B.
*
TONY
We got Seminoles, in the swamp.
Tony waits for a response. Nothing.
TONY (cont'd)
I repeat, Indians in the swamp.
Tony clears his throat into the radio.
RADIO VOICE
I don't know what you want me to say.
TONY
Barry, Indians do not go on swamp walks.
If there are Indians in the swamp, they
are in there for a reason.
No response. Tony glowers, gets out of the truck, watches
the vehicles through binoculars. Nothing. He straightens
his cap. Mosquitoes land on his neck, his nose, his lips.
pg. 4
9
INT. L.A. BUSINESS LUNCH RESTAURANT - MIDDAY
9
Kaufman, wearing his purple sweater sans tags, sits with
Valerie, an attractive woman in wire-rim glasses. They pick
at salads. Kaufman steals glances at her lips, her hair, her
breasts. She looks up at him. He blanches, looks down.
*
KAUFMAN
She looked at my hairline. She thinks
*
I'm old. She thinks I'm fat. She --
*
VALERIE
We think you're great.
*
KAUFMAN
Oh, thanks, wow. That's nice to hear.
A rivulet of sweat slides down his forehead. Valerie watches
*
it. Kaufman sees her watching it. She sees him seeing her
watching it. She looks at her salad. He quickly swabs.
VALERIE
We all just loved the Malkovich script.
*
KAUFMAN
Thank you. That's... I appreciate that.
*
VALERIE
(still looking at her salad)
Such a unique voice. Boy, I'd love to
*
find a portal into your brain.
*
KAUFMAN
*
(laughing)
*
Trust me, it's no fun.
*
VALERIE
*
(laughs)
*
So you're in production, right?
*
KAUFMAN
Yeah, it is. They are. We are.
*
VALERIE
That must be so exciting.
*
KAUFMAN
Yeah
*
Uncomfortable silence. Kaufman tries to fill it.
*
KAUFMAN (cont'd)
It's exciting to see one's work produced.
*
(CONTINUED)
pg. 5
9
CONTINUED:
9
VALERIE
*
(looking up)
*
I bet.
(looking up)
So --
Kaufman looks up, too. His brow is dripping again. Valerie
*
pretends not to notice.
*
VALERIE (cont'd)
*
Good. So, tell me your thoughts on this
crazy little project of ours.
In one motion, Kaufman swabs his forehead and pulls a book
entitled The Orchid Thief from his bag.
KAUFMAN
First, I think it's a great book.
VALERIE
Laroche is a fun character, isn't he?
Kaufman nods, flips through the book, stalling. A photo of
*
author Susan Orlean smiles from the inside back cover.
*
KAUFMAN
Absolutely. And Orlean makes orchids so
fascinating. Plus her musings on
Florida, orchid poaching. Indians.
Great, sprawling New Yorker stuff. I'd
want to remain true to that, let the
movie exist rather than be artificially
plot driven.
VALERIE
Okay, great, great. I guess I'm not
*
exactly sure what that means.
KAUFMAN
Oh. Well... I like to let my work
*
evolve, so I'd want to go into it with
*
sort of open-ended kind of... and also
*
not force it into a typical movie form.
*
VALERIE
Oh. That sounds interesting... what
*
you're saying. I mean, I'm intrigued.
KAUFMAN
(blurting)
It's just, I don't want to ruin it by
making it a Hollywood product. Like, an
orchid heist movie or something.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
pg. 6
9
CONTINUED: (2)
9
KAUFMAN (cont'd)
Or changing the orchids into poppies and
turning it into a movie about drug
running. Y'know? Why can't there be a
movie simply about flowers? That's all.
VALERIE
That's what we're thinking. Definitely.
*
KAUFMAN
Like, I don't want to cram in sex, or car
*
chases, or guns. Or characters learning
profound life lessons. Or growing or
*
coming to like each other or overcoming
obstacles to succeed in the end. Y'know?
The book isn't like that. Life isn't
like that. It just isn't. I feel very
*
strongly about this.
*
Kaufman is sweating like crazy now. Valerie is quiet. We
*
hear Kaufman's self-flagellating voice-over through the
*
silence, but we can't make out the words. Then:
*
VALERIE
I guess we thought maybe Susan Orlean and
*
Laroche could fall in and --
*
KAUFMAN
Okay, but to me -- this alienated
*
journalist writing about a passionate
*
backwoods guy and he teaches her to love--
that's like... fake. I mean, it didn't
happen. It wouldn't happen.
*
10
INT. OFFICE - DAY
10
SUBTITLE: HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA, THREE WEEKS EARLIER
The office is decorated with potted flowers, Audubon posters,
lots of books. Margaret, a soulful development executive,
unpack boxes. Kaufman appears in the open doorway. In the
*
hall behind him are framed posters for action movies.
*
KAUFMAN
Knock knock.
Margaret turns.
MARGARET
Char-lay Kauf-man!
She hugs him enthusiastically.
(CONTINUED)
pg. 7
10
CONTINUED:
10
MARGARET (cont'd)
What are you doing in this Godforsaken
hell-hole?
KAUFMAN
Meeting upstairs.
*
MARGARET
(mock impressed)
Ooh, with Robert? Oooh.
*
KAUFMAN
(smiles, nods)
*
So... just wanted to say hello,
*
congratulate you on the promotion.
Pretty fancy office, Margie!
MARGARET
Well, thanks. It's all so stupid.
KAUFMAN
It's great. Are you kidding? I saw your
photo in Variety and everything. Very
*
very cool.
MARGARET
Oh, God, such an awful picture.
KAUFMAN
You looked great.
MARGARET
Anyway. So what's with you? Come in,
man. Take a load off.
Kaufman enters, sits on the couch. Margaret closes the door.
MARGARET (cont'd)
(mock whisper)
Lousy with spies.
Kaufman laughs. Margaret sits down next to him. He tenses
at the closeness, covers by talking.
*
KAUFMAN
I'm considering jobs. Mostly crap.
There's one you might like, about
flowers.
MARGARET
Flowers? Really?
*
(CONTINUED)
pg. 8
10
CONTINUED: (2)
10
KAUFMAN
Demme's company wants to adapt this book
*
The Orchid Thief. About orchids.
MARGARET
Cool. You should definitely do it.
*
Kaufman is thrilled; he's scored.
KAUFMAN
I loved the book is all.
*
MARGARET
I'll read it. You're all the
recommendation I need.
(presses button on phone)
Andy, could you get a book called The
Orchid Thief by...
*
KAUFMAN
Susan Orlean.
MARGARET
Susan Orlean. Thanks.
(hangs up, smiles at him)
*
If anyone could figure out how to do a
movie about flowers, it would be you.
KAUFMAN
I dunno. I'd like to try. Y'know?
MARGARET
You should. Jesus, somebody needs to
*
save us all. And it sounds exciting, to
*
immerse yourself in a real subject and
*
learn everything about it. Get paid for
*
it! Charlie! Not this movie bullshit,
*
sex and drug deals and violence.
(looks up at ceiling and yells)
*
God, Robert, I'm so sick of it!
*
KAUFMAN
(looking at ceiling)
*
Margaret.
*
MARGARET
I don't care.
*
(looking up, yelling)
*
I don't care, Robert!
*
(back to Kaufman)
*
Hey, you know that Blake line about
*
seeing heaven in a wild flower? That's
the fucking truth, man.
*
(CONTINUED)
pg. 9
10
CONTINUED: (3)
10
KAUFMAN
I know.
*
MARGARET
I know you know.
*
(conspiratorially)
*
After you learn all this flower stuff,
*
you can teach me.
*
KAUFMAN
(thrilled but controlled)
That'd be fun.
*
11
EXT. MURKY POOL OF WATER - DAY
11
SUBTITLE: THE EARTH, THREE BILLION YEARS AGO
We move into the pool, closer, closer, until we see a single-
cell organism multiplying. Soon there are millions of them.
*
12
EXT. SWAMP - MORNING
12
Hot, dirty, miserable. Laroche leads the Indians through
waist-high black water. He points out a turtle on a rock.
LAROCHE
Pseudemys floridana. Did you fellas know
you fellas believe the world rests on the
back of a turtle? Not you fellas
specifically. Although, maybe you fellas
specifically. That I can't speak to.
The Indians ignore him. They trudge. Laroche spots
something else, a dull green root wrapped around a tree. He
stops, circles the tree. His eyes widen in reverent awe.
LAROCHE (cont'd)
A ghost. Polyrrhiza Lindenii.
The Indians come around. Laroche stares at a single
beautiful, glowing white flower hanging from the tree. He
tenderly caresses the petals. Then, business-like:
LAROCHE (cont'd)
Cut it down, Russell.
Russell pulls out a hacksaw, begins sawing through the tree.
13
INT. RESTAURANT - MIDDAY
13
Kaufman still sweats as he talks to Valerie.
(CONTINUED)
Add New Comment