EXT. MIDDLE OF NOWHERE - DAY
A windowless van comes to a violent stop on the side of the
The back doors open and a short white kid is thrown out of
it. Hes tied and gagged. This is DEREK. Our hero for today.
DEREK manages to roll farther to the side of the road.
A really big guy steps out of the van behind DEREK. It’s
Likewise, behind JOHN, COREY WEDGE steps out.
You just couldn’t leave it alone
could you man?
DEREK struggles to speak, but of course his mouth is covered.
I think he wants to say something.
JOHN takes the gag off DEREK.
COREY WEDGE (CONT’D)
Now what do you want faggot?
For the last time, I’m not gay. I’m
a little flamboyant at times butt.
COREY WEDGE pulls a gun out of back pocket and loads it.
Causing DEREK to get his ass thinking faster.
Guys, I swear to you, that was a
Not good enough.
Can I get a recalc? You know those
misses weren’t me.
Look, I have nothing against you
Derek. But Ryzen is paying me
Twenty bucks an hour.
COREY WEDGE gives JOHN a confused look.
Yeah, isn’t he...
Hell no! He’s only paying me ten.
What makes you so special?
I think we were in a conversation.
Shut the fuck up faggot!
Not a faggot...
I think we can make a deal.
You don’t shoot me... and I give
you a ten dollar gift card.
JOHN puts his arm around COREY WEDGE/
Gift card man. Those things never
He thinks about it for a second.
CORY WEDGE glares and shoots DEREK.
Bennigans is the Olive Garden of
Irish food. Come on John.
COREY WEDGE and JOHN move the shoot up body to some taller
grass and quickly move over to the van and get in.
INT. VAN - CONTINUOUS
So I made this mod to OpenITG...
COREY WEDGE grumbles.
It’s a text from your mom.
It’s badddddddd news.
EXT. MIDDLE OF NOWHERE - DAY
DEREK, clinging to life while staring at the sky, thinks
about his life.
Okay, you’re most likely wondering
what the fuck just happened there.
DEREK (V.O.) (CONT’D)
Let’s go back.
EXT. TEAM Z HEADQUARTERS (2 HOURS EARLIER) - DAY
Come one Derek... get physhed. You
can do this.
This is the headquarters of Team Z?
This dank ass house. Fuck this
It sucks I know. But come on in.
We’re waiting for you.
INT. DDR ROOM - CONTINUOUS
It’s a small dark room, illuminated only by a large TV
displaying some sort of dancing game. It can’t be recognised
from a distance.
RYZEN is sitting at the edge of the room in the darkness.
JOHN is standing next to him. COREY WEDGE and SUPTRASHCAN
wander about the room.
Glad to see you’ve come...
JOHN hands him a piece of paper.
You serious? That’s not a good DDR
Well, neither is John but...
Can’t you see I’m speaking here?
RYZEN gets up and starts to walk around. DEREK is paralyzed
with fear at this point.
Fat man... How can you be so
RYZEN walks up to DEREK
Anyway... Derek... What bring you
to Team Z?
He stutters a couple of times.
I hear there’s a lot of money in
Yes, there is.
Shut up John! God damn!
What do I have to do?
Simple. I need you to gain a full
fantastic combo on this song.
FFC? I thought those were a rumor.
Yeah, guess what. It’s not.
Shouldn’t be too hard. I’ve been
playing for a good year...
He walks up to the pad on the ground.
What happens if I... you know.
Don’t do it.
Oh, then John’s gonna take you to
the middle of nowhere and shoot
your scrubby ass.
RYZEN slowly walks to DEREK and kindly touches his shoulder.
Nothing personal. Dancing games are
just serious business. We can’t
have sub par players just AAing
shit all willy nilly.
But this isn’t DDR.
It’s In The Groove. It’s better.
The player is in control of the
I’m talking John! Christ!
Go on Derek. Try your luck.
You know, I think I’m good...
Either way you’ll got shot. So I
suggest you go ahead and try.
Come on Derek. You can do this.
It’s just like at home.
DEREK plays very well through a pretty hard nine footer.
RYZEN and the other stare in amazement.
Until. That is, the results screen pops up. He has one miss.
It appears that you have failed
What? Are you serious.
I was fucking ripped off!
EXT. MIDDLE OF NOWHERE (2 HOURS LATER) - DAY
DEREK continues to lay there. Bleeding to death.
So yeah. Here I am.
Serious business. My ass.
He struggles to sit up.
So this is how it ends huh? A
fucking pad miss. This is some
I swear it wasn’t me.
He spots someone approaching from a distance. The image
becames clearer as he gets closer. It’s his friend JOE.
Foursquare saves lives. Thanks for
leaving your GPS on.
It checked you in at “Middle of
Nowhere”. This is where they take
motherfuckers and shoot them. Why
it’s a location on Foursquare, I
All right, dumb question. Let’s get
you to the car.
INT. CAR - MOMENTS LATER
JOE is driving in a fairly hasty fashion as DEREK bleeds the
fuck over the seats.
Okay, so why the fuck did you get
Your brother... and Corey Wedge.
Took me out there and shot me.
I got the idea you were shot
already. But why?
And since when does my brother John
work for Ryzen?
Since he started paying him. Pretty
INT. CAR - MOMENTS LATER
You didn’t try to join them did
You know that shit’s illegal after
the Liquid Boom incident.
I know, but it’s money.
But to get mixed up with someone
He seems like an okay guy.
You’re bleeding all over my car.
I saw something though.
It wasn’t DDR I played...
No, it was diffrent.
It must have been Open ITG...
John won’t shut the fuck up about
It gave me a pad miss...
It’s fucking evil.
We need to get you fixed up. Come
EXT. YVETTE’S HOUSE - DAY
JOE assists DEREK to the front door of a small house.
JOE rings the doorbell.
I think she can help.
Oh, fuck no. Not again.
Come on Yvette.
You bring me that nigger last week,
now a homo?
I’m not a homo!
I can’t be healing your nigger
friends and homo friends every
You’re the only one that can help.
It was DDR.
YVETTE pauses and sighs.
Bring him in.
INT. YVETTE’S HOUSE/LIVING ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
DEREK is laying on a couch. YVETTE is bandaging his gunshot
JOE is leaning against the wall watching impatiently.
You all shouldn’t be fucking with
That’s what I told him.
Shit. Hold still faggot.
YVETTE pulls the bullet out.
Dance Dance Revolution is dangerous
you know. Lot of crazy characters
Wasn’t always that way...
What exactly happened?
It’s complicated sweetie.
This shit can’t stand.
DEREK tries to sit up. But is stopped by YVETTE.
Come now. Rest.
Fuck that shit. I’m gonna fuck his