These days, there are a lot of techniques, tricks, and routines available to the
average guy, that promise to help him "get the girl."
Most of that stuff being sold out there rarely works to help you get more dates, if at
You see, at the end of the day, giving a bunch of techniques is useless to a guy if he is
too nervous, anxious or even afraid to approach women. If he can't bolster up the
courage to walk up and talk to a beautiful woman, none of the techniques or "lines"
will work ever work because he will never get to use any of them.
And, even if he did somehow pump himself up and drum up enough courage to
approach a woman, that woman will see through his fake and/or temporary
'confidence' and will probably rip him to shreds.
The hotter the woman is, the quicker she will send the guy running off with his tail
between his legs. (If you've ever tried approaching a "10," you may have already
experienced this personally.)
So ... if you ever want to "fix" your dating life and your ability to attract and date
beautiful women - permanently, you must fix your mind first! Or else, everything
else you do will be a waste of time. None of it will work unless you work on adopting
the seductive mindset!
The average guy walks into the dating game with the belief that he has to impress a
woman by showing her - or telling her about - his success, riches, status, fame,
And while those things may get some women's attention, it will rarely work to
attract them to you. The women that do get attracted to you because of your
money, success, or status will almost always be the wrong kind of women, i.e. gold
diggers, who are not interested in you, but only in your money and/or success.
The same is true for guys who are "good looking" and only use their looks to try to
seduce women. Again, that will only attract women who are interested in how you
look - not in who you are. (Plus, we all know that "looks" are always temporary.)
And, even if you did happen to attract a women with just your looks, if you don't
have anything else going for you - besides your good looks, the average woman will
lose interest in you very quickly. She will get bored and move on. (It's the equivalent
of choosing a gift with the shinest wrapper, unwrapping it, and being disappointed at
what you find inside.)
Unless you've worked on adopting the right mindset, none of the other stuff will
work. And, if that other stuff does work, it will usually attract the wrong kind of
women ... so the 'success' you achieve will be very temporary.
... in order to become genuinely attractive to women, without relying on money,
status, good looks or shiny new clothes, you have to know and understand what
women are really attracted to! (Not what they say or think they're attracted to - but
what they are really attracted to.)
And, in order to understand what women are attracted to, you must first understand
and really "get" what women are not attracted to. You must understand what
women are turned off - or even repelled - by.
And you must learn to never do those things around women.
Here's a list of some of the most common "turn offs" and repulsive behaviors:
1. Being too nervous, fidgety, anxious, in awe of, and generally uncomfortable
around her. (This is where we started, remember?)
Trying to be macho, arrogant, egotistic, a jerk, a "bad boy" etc. (Yes, some women
are attracted to jerks or "bad boys" but pretending to be one of those guys will only
backfire on you. Remember, getting "pumped up" before approaching her isn't the
best strategy to use.)
2. Being too "nice," agreeing with everything she says, kissing up to her, or any such
behavior - in hopes of trying to make her "like" you.
3. Trying too hard to keep the conversation going, not being comfortable enough to
just talk and have fun naturally, and even trying too hard to be funny.
The first one, # 1, listed above is one of the main reasons guys don't attract women.
It is also a big reason as to why the other turn-offs, listed in numbers 2 - 5 exist.
When you're uncomfortable around beautiful women (or women in general,)
nothing else will work in your favor, especially not techniques or pickup lines that
you've practiced for hours.
When you're uncomfortable, you will try to impress her too much, you will pretend
to be macho and confident, you will kiss up to her, and you will even try too hard to
keep the conversation interesting and/or flowing naturally.
There are many techniques you can use to "fix" this problem - from easy to complex,
from quick to more time-consuming.
One of the easiest ways to become comfortable around women is to stop trying to
attract them or date them (for now) ... and just start talking to them - as if they were
any other stranger you happened to come across, i.e. a woman you're not attracted
to, a child, or even a guy.
Simply start talking to women - all women, anywhere and everywhere. Talk to them
as you would another human being. Stop trying to impress them or seduce them.
If this is not easy for you to do, start by talking to women you're not attracted to - as
And start by simply saying "Hi" or "Hello."
Do not worry about how they respond. Just do it - with a friendly smile. And, instead
of letting their response affect you emotionally, simply observe what they do or say.
Think of it as a social experiment. Imagine the entire world is your laboratory.
Remember, your goal here is not to attract or seduce her. It's to simply get your
mind (and body) to become comfortable with the idea of talking to women.
It's a gradual process, so don't force it too much. And, don't beat yourself up over it
Just think of it as practice. Any sport or activity that you want to get good at requires
practice. And, at first it may seem slow-going, but things will pick up speed as you
continue working and putting in the time.
Just do it, and forget about the results for now. (Just think of it as a social
experiment, as I mentioned earlier.)
Say "Hi" or Hello" to random strangers for a week, wherever you see them.
Then, add "How are you?" and do that for another week. (If they start talking to you,
then obviously respond in like.)
Then, for the next week, try to have (read: initiate) an actual conversation with them
for at least a minute or two. (Talk about the weather, their cool hat, or whatever. Just
get used to the idea of talking to strangers.)
The more comfortable you become with doing this, the better, and more positively,
they will respond to you. And, this constant, upward cycle will continue to feed itself
- as you become more comfortable and competent.