New Ending

EXT. WAREHOUSE
WOLFEN
You sure this is it.
DEREK
He texted me. This address.
WOLFEN
This neighborhood sucks. I'm out.
DEREK
Where you going?
WOLFEN
Home. This is bullshit.
DEREK
Wait.
WOLFEN
Where are Joe and Yvette?
DEREK
Yvette said she'd might us here.
Joe isn't back from that journey of
discovery to Taco Bell.
WOLFEN
Those bitches aren't coming. Bye.
DEREK
I can't do this alone.
WOLFEN
You're going to have to. Couples
mode hasn't been around since DDR
4th mix.
DEREK
What?
WOLFEN
What?
DEREK
It doesn't look like anyone is here
anyway. So let's just go home.
WOLFEN
I live in the fucking park. It's
gonna be nightfall soon.

---

2.
DEREK
What are you so spooked about? It's
just nighttime.
WOLFEN
The raccoons man. They're
everywhere. Don't make me go back
there at night.
WOLFEN (CONT'D)
They watch me all day for trees
man. Looking for their time to
strike.
DEREK
All right, all right...
WOLFEN
Thank you.
They knock on the front door.
DOORMAN answers it.
DOORMAN
Yes?
DEREK
Yeah, this the place where the DDR
stuff is going down. From Ryzen's
tweet?
DOORMAN
I'm afraid I don't know what you
mean.
WOLFEN
You know Ryzen invited us here.
DOORMAN
I don't know shit.
WOLFEN
Clearly.
DOORMAN
Let me check the list. Name?
WOLFEN
Wolfen.
DOORMAN
Don't see you.

---

3.
WOLFEN
You didn't even look. At least do
me the fucking curtesy of a face
look.
DOORMAN
What?
WOLFEN
I thought we lived in a post-racial
America.
DOORMAN
Guess what, we don't. Go away.
Furry.
WOLFEN
What are you saying about furries?
DOORMAN
I'm talking about furries. Always
peeing on shit.
WOLFEN
What?
DEREK
Yeah... anyway.
DEREK (CONT'D)
Is there a Derek on there?
DOORMAN
Derek... Derek...
DOORMAN (CONT'D)
Oh yeah, you're the guy. Come in.
DOORMAN (CONT'D)
Oh, you can bring the furry in as
well.
DEREK
Come on.
WOLFEN
I know that's right.
INT. WAREHOUSE
There's actually a decent number of people turning out for
Derek's demise. In the center of the room is a DDR setup.

---

4.
RYZEN
Derek!
DEREK
Ryzen.
MONSTER JOE
Astounding. He's here on time.
RYZEN
Fuck is with the Dragonball Z Cell
Saga bullshit you got going on with
the hair?
YVETTE
I think it's kinda sexy. Shut up.
RYZEN
You shut up!
WOLFEN
When did you two get here?
MONSTER JOE
We parked in the back.
YVETTE
There were signs and everything.
WOLFEN
Seriously, we took like... 2 trains
and a bus.
MONSTER JOE
We offered you a ride.
YVETTE
Yeah, you were all like, "I gotta
train this moron. And it's gonna
take forever."
DEREK
Hey, least I'm not trying to get
some raccoons to sign a peace
treaty.
WOLFEN
They're some clever motherfuckers.
I'm telling you.
YVETTE
I've tried. Raccoons aren't having
it. Bunch of bitches.
(MORE)

---

5.
YVETTE (CONT'D)
Always breaking into your garbage
and stealing shit.
MONSTER JOE
But if it's garbage, are they
really stealing?
RYZEN
HELLO?
DEREK
Sorry.
RYZEN
Gaze upon your demise. Your Dance
Dance Revolution... demise.
DOORMAN
Good one sir!
RYZEN
Shut up. Man the door!
RYZEN (CONT'D)
Fucking doorman.
RYZEN (CONT'D)
Glad of you guys to join me...
finally. You guys running on
colored people time or some shit?
DEREK
Hey, I had to epicly train for
this.
RYZEN
It took forever. We have a
timetable here.
DEREK
Don't you rush my epicness! You're
just like my mom!
RYZEN
The fuck?
DEREK
I've been training Jboy style. I
can't lose.

---

6.
RYZEN
Jboy... that punk. He fucking
retired after he knew he couldn't
hang in the same league as me and
the rest of Team Z.
RYZEN (CONT'D)
Do you know what Team Z is all
about?
DEREK
I'm sure you're going to tell us.
RYZEN
POISE!
RYZEN (CONT'D)
ELEGANCE!
RYZEN (CONT'D)
SEXINESS! Because let's face it, I
look good.
MONSTER JOE
He does look good.
YVETTE
Gotta agree.
RYZEN
Not to mention, money.
MONSTER JOE
Make dat dolla.
RYZEN
But enough of that bullshit. We're
here to have some fun, no?
WOLFEN
So how we gonna do this?
RYZEN
Well, I could just shoot you all.
But that would be too simple.
WOLFEN
Typical villain mistake.
RYZEN
What?

---

7.
WOLFEN
You could just kill us now. Save
yourself a load of shit. Just
sayin'. In doing this. You only
give us more chances to escape
and/or kill you.
YVETTE
He's right.
DEREK
So what's the deal here?
RYZEN
Sudden death Open ITG.
DEREK
Sounds good.
RYZEN
I just have to go pee. Don't go
anywhere.
WOLFEN
Relax.
DEREK
But it's ITG... you remember what
happened last time. And look, a
fuckin Blueshark.
MONSTER JOE
I thought that was a Blueshark.
Those are never in stock in you
know.
DEREK
Really?
WOLFEN
Chill. Look at it this way... you
lose now and you won't have to
worry about it anymore.
DEREK
You're a muse Wolfen.
RYZEN
What's with the girl?
YVETTE
I came for the free food.

---

8.
RYZEN
That's it?
YVETTE
And I'm still taking his shit if he
dies.
DEREK
Nice.
YVETTE
Sorry man, your tele is mine.
RYZEN
I'm gonna go pee. When I come
back... it's on.
RYZEN walks towards the bathroom.
YVETTE
This just screams epic doesn't it.
MONSTER JOE
I've gone deaf.
INT. WAREHOUSE
JOSH comes out of the bathroom.
JOSH
That's a missle well launched.
RYZEN
What the fuck are you?
RYZEN shoots JOSH.
RYZEN (CONT'D)
Jesus. All this random shit going
on.
INT. WAREHOUSE
WOLFEN
Relax, you'll do fine.
DEREK
You don't understand. This is all
about the power of arrows. I can't
fail. It could mean death and
destruction to us all.

---

9.
YVETTE
Just remember this. My ancestors
used to say this.
WOLFEN
English wisdom.
YVETTE
In every job there is to be done,
there is an element of fun. Find
the fun, and snap. The job's a
game.
YVETTE (CONT'D)
It's all just a game.
DEREK
But again. I could die.
YVETTE
Don't rain on my parade.
RYZEN
Ahhh... fuck do I feel lighter.
RYZEN (CONT'D)
Shall we Derek. Best of 5?
DEREK
Sounds fair.
WOLFEN
Don't die!
DEREK
Best advice I've heard today.
WOLFEN
Take that Mary Poppins.
DEREK and RYZEN play best of 5. With DEREK winning on the
5th. Before the final round. DEREK goes into a speech about
him being gay.
RYZEN
How could I lose? It was so damn
perfect.
YVETTE
Oh you lost! Stop being so butthurt
already.

---

10.
RYZEN
You know this isn't over right?
There will be more like me.
DEREK
I really don't think so, after
everyone hears about this, no one
is playing in the groove anymore.
MONSTER JOE
Dumpstream.
RYZEN
At least my hair looks good.
RYZEN (CONT'D)
Damn nigga.
DEREK
So I guess that's what we call a
victory around here.
YVETTE
It feels good. And you finally
admitted you like cock. Everyone's
a winner.
WOLFEN
We all have one speed. GO.
YVETTE
Stop it.
WOLFEN
Sorry.
DEREK
Well, I suppose that's all the DDR
we're doing for today. Let's go eat
fried chicken!

---